Saturday, September 03, 2005

Isn’t “Musing” Supposed To Imply a Muse at Work?

You know this is the year we’re gonna win it all, right? I say this knowing that I’m a Giants fan, ergo not optimistic by nature, but there’s some method to my madditude.

The Giants are barely in third place, having defeated the Diamondbacks last night. Yay! And they’re not far out of second place—indeed, if they somehow sweep Arizona and the Dodgers on this trip, things’ll get mighty interesting. So we should be pretty excited. I mean, the team certainly is better than it was a month ago, wouldn’t you say?

So you watch. They’ll rip through September, overtake the still-not-particularly-good Padres, and win the division—making them the first-ever division winner with a losing record. (Texas in 1994 doesn’t count. They might have turned it around, were it not for an inconvenient strike.) And, continuing to play hotter than Halle Berry in a parka in Death Valley, drinking scalding coffee and singing “We’re Havin’ a Heat Wave,” the Giants will plow through an astounded St. Louis and an unprepared Atlanta. And, of course, we’ll be delighted, our minds boggled beyond belief.

And into the World Series we shall go! It doesn’t matter who wins the AL pennant. The Giants will bury them in five games, tops! And we shall be World Champions! Yay!

At which time we Giants fans, instead of being derided for following a team that hasn’t won a World Series in 50 years, will be derided for following the only World Champion with a losing record, ever. This would almost typify being a San Francisco Giants fan. (Except for the “World Championship” part, but you know what I mean.)

Well, this certainly would be okay with me, actually—the logic here having to do with ruling in Hell.

So let’s leave this happy topic. Anyone else notice the Toyota commercials on both TV and radio lately? Tell me if there’s something just a tadlet funky about the strident, dramatic background tune:

“What shall we do with the drunken driver
“What shall we do with the drunken driver
“What shall we do with the drunken driver
“Ear-lye in the morning?”

I know it can't be just me.

1 comment:

  1. And... and... and BARRY BONDS WILL MAKE A MIRACULOUS COMEBACK, LEADING THE WAY!!! It'll be great, too, because he won't be on steroids, I mean, those things really kept him back, I think, only hitting 60, 70 homers a season. Without the juice he'll certainly hit the 50 homers now during the months of Sept and Oct to get us the rings, baby...

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